God's Grace and more...

I would not know how to begin to thank God for His grace or even rave about.

The day when I found out I lost my job, I was so grateful that 1) I scheduled lunch that day with a good friend who comforted me and calmed me down a bit. When I got home 2) my husband literally spent 2 hours on the couch with me just comforting me by listening and planning the next steps for us. He was so supportive of the situation that he acted on it as soon as he could. 3) On my way home, although I know my therapist is super busy, I called to see if my therapist is free. What a coincidence that somebody cancelled. This way, I could see him on Thursday. Perfect!

The next day, although I had a headache, I took it as a sign to relax. My best girl from highschool made sometime for me and thanks to affordable Skype, we could really talk. I was afterwards comforted by my brother. Apart from that, I send numerous SMS to other gfs and I got so many words of affirmation. Its overrated to say that support from loved ones is so important in a very tough moment such as rejection.

I mean, I am just so thankful for what God has brought as a support for me. True that I still feel uncertain about the future, but I am praying that Thy will be done and that He prepares me mentally and emotionally for what is to come...

After Rejection

Today I just found out that my job contract would not be renewed. I was shocked. Almost 3 weeks ago, I had a conversation with my boss about working on my reintegration to my old role. When she told me the sad news today, I could only ask questions on what changed. 

I asked 3x why she changed her mind, why shes not pushing through with my reintegration program and Im happy I did. Im proud I did. 6 months ago, I wouldnt be able to ask this question at all and just accept what my boss said. I came from a culture where bosses are treated with such respect as a source of authority.

I know, despite my momentary lack of motivation to work because of what happened at the beginning of my career here in the Netherlands, I always had the interest of my teams. I know Im a people manager and that I am an effective coach. I am talented in building relationships in and out of my team, I am a quick learner and I am creative. With my determined spirit and intelligence, I can conquer any challenges in team management.

I realized that processing rejection is not an easy process. I need to feel the hurt and if I can get answers as to why, I need to get them. I have the right to know what to learn from.  As what my husband said, there is freedom in this. At least I know that I dont need to fight anymore. I can spend the next 2 months looking for a new opportunity and rebuild a new career path. It is time for a fresh start...

It is important for me to stay not just positive but to keep in my heart Gods promises. God is a good God. His plans are good, pleasing and perfect. He is always in control. As in the verse that I read also today, I will not stop praying....I pray that God gives me the grace to rise above this rejection stronger than ever, that He showers me with favor as I look for a job that will hopefully give me a knowledge migrant visa or that my husband could find a job soon so he can sponsor me in my stay here so I there wont be any gap between now and my new visa but most of all, may I yield to His will. 

God surpasses my strength and limitations. And because of that, I am powerful.